Review Me Twice - Dark Witch by Nora Roberts

I'm kind of glad that this was the final book we read this month.  I mean, what better way to end the month than with the queen of romance novels?  Who hasn't heard of Nora Roberts?  And while you may not have read any of her books, you sure know what's going to be in them when you pick them up.

I actually enjoyed this book WAY more than I thought I was going.  Ok, so bullet point time.  Obvious flaws of this book:

-The main characters is super all powerful special snowflake witch
-She falls in love with main character male
   *Who just happens to be super hot.
   *and constantly compared to horses which, ok, in all honesty, really doesn't have to do with    
     anything, but listening to a guy trying to me manly compared to a horse over and over in a Irish
     accent is just a little ridiculous (I had the audio book.)
-They fell in love in about a week.
-They were married in like... six months.
-I'm fairly certain they hopped into bed in under week.

So the romance half of the book... ridiculous and predictable and not how real life works at all even a little bit.  So why did I like this book?

Well, because outside of the horrible romance, there was actual plot going on.  Iona (our main character) moves to Ireland to find family, and finds two cousins with magical powers like hers, powers that have been passed down through her family for generations to fight off this witch (Cadvan) that's been trying to kill her family for a couple hundred years.

There is her coming into her powers and having a growing relationship with her family and getting friends and starting a life in Ireland.  I mean, the characters are surprisingly round and dynamic (when they're not sleeping with each other every five seconds.)  So is it a typical romance novel?  Well, yes, but I kind of liked it.  Not enough to go seek out the second book, but enough that one day I might pick it up.

I'm so glad this month is over. If I'm lucky, we'll never revisit romance here on the blog again. I figured, if I'm ever going to like a book that belongs solidly in the romance genre, it'll be one by Nora Roberts. Everyone gushes about how amazing she is; if she can't convert me to a romance reader, nobody can. Well, apparently nobody can, if that logic holds.

I just didn't care about anything in this book. I tried to. I could see why I should care. I just didn't. I do appreciate that there's something larger than the romance aspect going on - the "actual plot" Cassy mentioned above - but I didn't care about that, either.

This is definitely one of those times where I'm fully aware that this is just my personal preferences talking, though. It's a well-written book. It's just not the book for me. In library science, we have five "laws," called Ranganathan's Laws. One is "every book its reader" and another is "every reader their book." This book has the right readers, and I am not a part of that group. And there are books for me, and they don't live in the romance section. Sorry, romance; it's not you... it's me.

Types of Romance

I don't know what you guys picture when someone says "romance," but typically people think of a dozen red roses, expensive champagne served in expensive champagne flutes at an expensive, dimly-lit restaurant by a maitre'd in a tuxedo, rose petals on a bed, expensive and shiny jewelry, and chocolate.

Oh yeah, and sunsets. Don't forget about sitting somewhere together watching a sunset.

In the world of arts and literature, however, "romance" means many different things.

Hellenistic romance refers to five specific novels, the only ones we still have from ancient Greece.

Chivalric romance is a subgenre containing medieval and Renaissance narrative fiction. It has a heavy focus on heterosexual love, courtly manners, and heroic knight-errants going on quests.

The general genre of romance has as its focus people in romantic love, which is defined as "the expressive and pleasurable feeling from an emotional attraction towards another person." They also have to have a satisfying and optimistic ending.

When it comes to film, there's your basic romance which is pretty much a romance novel in film form, and the romantic comedy, which you can only be unaware of if you live in the exact center of the Serengeti, and is a hybrid of a romance film and a comedy film, using elements from both.

Then you have Romanticism, which was an artistic and intellectual movement in the late 18th and early 19th centuries. Within that movement, you have Romantic music, the style used by Beethoven, Chopin, Brahms, and Wagner; Romantic poetry, used by Keats and Wordsworth; and even Romanticism in science, which contrasted Enlightenment mechanistic natural philosophy, and promoted anti-reductionism, epistemological optimism, creativity, experience, and genius.

Review Me Twice - DarkFever by Karen Marie Moning

So the book wasn't ACTUALLY as bad as I expected.  It was the first surprise I've gotten this month (though, not the last.)  I was expecting hot and heavy sex by page three and the two main characters to be desperately in love by the end of the book.

But it's book one in a series and you can tell that Moning is in for the long haul with this book.  It's told from Mac's perspective, her future self telling the reader about her past experiences, in this case, about finding out about her powers, about her past and her heritage.

I like that Moning used this book to lay down the ground work for her novels.  She was setting up her story and her characters and really giving us a chance to get used to the world that we were being thrown into.

That being said... it's still really obvious it's being set up to be Overly Sexualized Romance Novel.  There are Fae's whose sole purpose are to make you want to have sex with them (our main character gets naked in public twice.)  It's clear that her and Barrons dislike each other so much that the only eventuality is that they are going to fall for each other.  The whole point of Faes is to steal people's beauty or lives or to sex them to death, so on that front, it's all kind of ridiculous.

But if you're looking for something fun and easy, this one has just enough substance to keep you interested but not enough to really make you think too much.

Did you know that the best way to pitch a movie in Hollywood is to describe your script as "[popular movie] but [twist]"? I feel like I'm doomed to see all paranormal romance as "Twilight but [twist]." For example, I saw Darkfever as "Twilight but Irish." It's not really anything specific about the characters' relationship or even the plot that makes me think "Twilight"; it's just that I see paranormal romance and start making connections to Twilight immediately. It could be my fault for letting Twilight be the first paranormal romance I ever read.

Otherwise, I agree with Cassy. I expected less mystery and detective work about the protagonist's sister's death and more immediate jumping into bed with the Adonis character, so that was a pleasant surprise.

I didn't really enjoy it, but this isn't my genre. I had to work really hard to push myself through it because I had to tell you guys about it. I would have put it down and walked away days ago if I could have. But like I said... this isn't my scene.

Purple Prose

Purple prose is a phrase that got thrown around a lot during my fan fiction days, but it's just as applicable in regular fiction.  In fact, romance novels are usually the prime breeding ground for it.  So, since we're doing nothing but reading romance novels this month, I thought I'd give you a little background on it.

Dictionary.com defines it as: writing that calls attention to itself because of its obvious use of certain effect, as exaggerated sentiment or pathos, especially in an attempt to enlist or manipulate the reader's sympathies.

That definition is almost purple prose. Urban Dictionary makes it a little more concise, "a term used to describe literature where the writing is unnecessarily flowery" and even gives a great example of it:

She lay upon her silken sheets in her ornately embellished robes of satin, her chest ascending and descending easily with every passing second, deep inside the caverns of her subconscious mind.

So why do we see this so much in romance novels?  Well, often the idea is that the flowery language is romantic, for one, and well placed.  It puts you in a certain mood when reading a book.  Whether that's actually true, well, who knows, but the idea is the language is romantic and ornate and makes a reader sign with how wonderful it is and gives you all the warm fuzzies.

The problem is, is that now a days it's crossed over into a lot of fan fiction, young authors using this overdone language because they haven't learned how to properly describe things.  So instead of saying something like, "the girl flipped her dirty blond hair", the author will instead write, "the girl's luscious dark blonde locks shimmered in the bright sunlight as she tossed her head, causing her hair to tumble over her shoulders."

That fan fiction is now getting turned into real life fiction (Fifty Shades of Grey anyone?) and the purple prose that used to get removed by a good editor now just slips right by.

So how can you avoid this in your writing?  Well, my rule for dialogue applies pretty well here too.  Read it out loud.  If you feel REALLY silly saying it, chances are, it's probably pretty silly reading it.

Author Bio: Janet Dailey

Janet Dailey was a romance author who wrote several series and dozens of single-title romance novels before she passed away last December. This week, we'll be reading A Cowboy Under My Christmas Tree because sometimes I tell Cassy a title as a joke and we wind up deciding to read the book after all.

Dailey became an author when she told her husband she could write better romance novels than what she was reading, and he challenged her to do so. She became the first American author for Harlequin. They actually turned Nora Roberts away because they already had an American author in Dailey. Another fun fact about Roberts and Dailey: in 1997, Roberts accused Dailey of plagiarizing her work, which Dailey admitted and said was caused by a psychological disorder. Dailey's books in question were pulled from print and the issue was settled out of court.

The Guinness Book of World Records recognized her achievement of setting a novel in every state in America.

Review Me Twice - Pearl Cove by Elizabeth Lowell

When I picked this book, I knew that it wasn't going to be a literary masterpiece (mainly because I'd read it before and knew what it entailed.)  And let me tell you: this book falls into all of the stereotypes of a romance novel.

Lowell makes it SEEM like her women are fierce and independent (and, ok, for a romance novel, most of them are) but they all seem to be at the mercy of their men.  They go to them for protection and fall almost instantly in love, unless they don't, and then they fall instantly in love but refuse to admit it.

Not to mention, there's copious amounts of sex.  I mean, normal human beings just don't have the kind of stamina that romance characters inevitably ALWAYS have.  The two characters can't seem to keep their hands off each other for five freakin' seconds, except, of course, during the three quarters fight.  You know, that "fight" that happens about three fourths of the way through the book, making you think that they will never be together because they could never repair ALL THE DIFFERENCES!!  

However, and this is a really big however, it IS a romance novel.  When I pick the book up, I'm not reading it for its literary value or because I think the plot is going to be wonderful or the characters incredibly complex.  I'm reading because, sometimes, I just want a book that's easy and laid back and requires no real effort on my part.  And, in terms of romance novels, Lowell puts an incredible amount of research into this one (and the others of this series.)  There is a monstrosity of information about pearl culturing and pearl trade and how to buy/sell/find/match/survive pearls.  You can tell that there was a lot of research on her part which, more often than not, doesn't happen in romance.

So, bottom line.  Great literary novel?  Not even close.  Pleasantly surprising fluff read?  Yes.

One of my coworkers saw this book sitting on my desk and was surprised that I read Elizabeth Lowell, because I'm not the romance novel type. I explained that, no, this one was for the blog, and I really didn't do the whole romance novel thing. She pointed out that at least Lowell isn't your typical romance novel, and I had to agree.

There's a real story going on in this book. There's a murder and intrigue and, as Cassy pointed out, actual research was done. (Granted, I didn't fact-check because I don't really like pearls and don't really care about them that much, though I do care very much about oysters, since I live right on top of the Chesapeake Bay and they're kind of a big deal around here.)

So if you like romance novels but you feel like you need something a little bit more substantial, try out this author. If you really hate romance novels, this still really isn't for you (unless you want to give them a shot but don't want to pick up something with Fabio and a sword on the cover).

Romance Novel Covers

I'm giving myself a softball topic this week, since I'm still in wedding recovery mode (by the way, thanks for all the congratulations!)... Romance novel covers.

The first element to a great romance novel cover is bedroom eyes. You know, the half-lidded, if-you-don't-get-it-quite-right-you-just-look-high look that is meant to inspire loin-tingling goodness in your target partner.

Next up, you should look into bare-chestedness. For the men... you'll get in trouble putting bare-chested ladies in the "romance novel" section; those are for erotica. (I know, thin line, but it makes a difference.) Bare backs work too, for both genders.

Don't forget the wind. Like, a lot of wind. Like, the hurricane is coming and you should have evacuated but now you're stuck so you might as well make a romance novel cover levels of wind.

Even has an appropriate title.

And finally, you're going to need an epic background: space, pirate ship, stormy sea, paradisiacal beach, whatever, as long as it's over the top and epic.

When all else fails, just go to WTF Bad Romance Covers for inspiration.

In Defense of the Romance Novel

We all have preconceptions about the romance novel.  They often have shallow characters, no development of their personalities.  The females are all usually delicate flowers that need to be rescued by the big strong man, or they're the bitchy girl that gets conquered by the man.

Is Fabio on the cover?  Then it's probably a romance novel.

These books don't exactly have any literary value.  They teach women to be accomidating, docile things, and that they can't get by without a man.  Likewise, it teaches women (and I suppose the handful of men that read them) that men have all the answers, all the smarts and need to take control of everything.

So why read these books?  Why would anyone ever pick up a novel like this?

Because sometimes, you NEED a book like that.  I love good books: books that make me think or cry or really challenges what I thought.  But sometimes, just sometimes, I want a book that I don't HAVE to think about it.  I want the ease of a book that has predictable plotlines, shallow characters and all the wrong messages.

Books like romance novels are great for the beach!  They're easy, fast reads that you can put down and pick back up with ease.  The stories aren't complex, so there isn't a lot of detail that I need to remember.  If I'm picking up something like Game of Thrones, I have to remember everything that's going on.  I really don't with something called, "Up Against the Wall" (real book, by the way.  It's currently the front runner at work for "Most Ridiculous Romance Novel Title.")

So am I going to sit here and tell you that Romance novels are the best books ever?  No, I'm not, because they're not.  But they are exactly what you need sometimes.

Favorite Dysfunctional Couple

Happy soon-to-be-Valentine's-Day! We're celebrating with our favorite not-so-perfect couples from literature, much like those from this week's review book, Dangerous Liaisons.

I think Hamlet and Ophelia from William Shakespeare's Hamlet are pretty dysfunctional, but I love them anyway. They're both psychotic in their own special ways, but they still love each other, despite all the craziness and scheming around them.

Hamlet doesn't understand women very well, thanks to his upbringing, so he misunderstands practically every move Ophelia makes. Polonius (Ophelia's father) doesn't want them to marry, because then Ophelia would have more power than him. He bans her from seeing Hamlet, and she obeys. Hamlet's mad at her for this.

But you know they still loved each other because of how Hamlet behaves at the funeral and how Ophelia can only respond to Hamlet's yelling at her by begging God to forgive him.

Aww.

If you don't think that Cersei and Jamie are the most dysfunctional couple ever, you've never read Game of Thrones.

If you're wondering why I'm choosing a brother & a sister when we're picking couples... well, then, you've also never read Game of thrones.

Let's just review a few bullet points of their relationship:

• They're twins, who have sex.
• All of Cersei's children are Jamie's
• Jamie joined the Kingsguard so that he could be near his sister.
• Jamie threw a kid out a window so no one would ever discover that he was having sex with his sister.
• Jamie got his hand cut off and now his sister thinks that he's gross
• We're pretty certain that either he, or his sister, killed Cersei's husband (who just happened to be the king.)
• They killed the king's adviser... a few of them, in fact.
• Cersei and Jamie's son is about the most horrible, malicious little prick you've ever met, and yet, he's now the king. 

They're on a constant quest for power, these two siblings, and they're doing everything that they can to bring everyone around them down.  Cersei at least has the sense to realize that she won't be quite so powerful if people figure out she's boinking her brother, but her brother doesn't seem to have that sense.  I'm only in book three, so I can only imagine that this relationship is going to get more... weird as the books continue.

Favorite Zombie Story

It was hard for me to pick a favorite zombie story to talk about, because my real favorite is the book we're reviewing this week, World War Z by Max Brooks. The next one I thought of was I Am Legend by Richard Matheson, and yes, I know it's more of a vampire book (but it heavily influenced the zombie genre). So then I thought of Boneshaker by Cherie Priest, but you've already heard us both weigh in on that one.

So that leaves me with a book I haven't actually finished reading: Warm Bodies by Isaac Marion. I saw the movie before I knew it was a book, and when I found out it was a book, I jumped into the library's holds queue for it. A few months later, when it finally got around to me, I didn't have time to read it all before it was due back.

But I love the writing, I love the characters, I love the story. I love that there are "levels" of zombies. And I really love that "zombie romance" is now a genre. But the thing I love most is that he's releasing a prequel called The New Hunger (and look, you can buy it here!)

In terms of zombie books, mine is actually TECHNICALLY a vampire book... but not really.

Do not let the cover fool you: This book is not about sex (at least, it won't be for another 8 books or so, but that's another matter.)  And don't like the title "Vampire Hunter" fool you either.  Yes, she is a vampire hunter.  But you know what Anita Blake is, first a foremost?  A zombie raiser.

That's right, Anita Blake raises zombies for a living.  Why, you might ask?  Because why get a judge to interpret a will when you can just raise the dead and ask them?  Vampires, zombies, lycanthropes are all known about and (generally) accepted things in this world.

As the series goes on, it gets crappy towards the latter half, but the first... oh six books or so, are great.  Probably the best zombie book of the bunch is The Laughing Corpse.

Anita is offered a lot of money to raise a really old zombie.  When someone else does it, they lose control of it, and we have a bonafide flesh eating Zombie.  

The series is good and Hamilton does a great job of creating great characters.  Just don't read past Obsidian Butterfly (#9), you'll be severely disappointed.

Review Me Twice - Stuck in Estrogen's Funhouse by Shayna Gier

This book wasn't really my cup of tea.  I feel like it was directed and maybe an older audience than me.  I'm not at the age where I'm having kids and hormones are doing weird things to my body, so it was hard for me to relate to the main character.

Marti was probably the best character in the book, with the possible exception of her best friend.  She was fleshed out and was going through something out of her control, which anyone can at least have an idea of.  Sometimes, we all go through something that's out of our hands, so in that way, she was a good character to follow along.

However, there were a few things that made it hard to really get into the book.  The first was probably that I think this book just needs a good edit that it didn't really get.  Which, can be difficult to do as a writer.  I know from personal experience, it can be hard to tear your book apart.  But this book had a lot of things that were irrelevant to the story or things that started out as a good point but seemed to get out of the author's control.  Also, the research in it was a little weak.  There were a lot of incorrect facts that could have been corrected by just a simple search.  But, like I said, most of this falls under the editing category.

The book has some good roots and starting points, but I just felt like it was a work in progress more than a finished product.

My Bottom Line 2 out of 5.

As I mentioned earlier in the week, I don't do chick lit. I don't read it; I don't write it; I generally don't like it. It's not you, chick lit; it's me.

That said, I still think there's something missing in this book. Conflict, mainly. Many people don't realize this, but narratives are more formulaic than you might think. Maybe some of you saw this diagram in English class at some point:

You start with exposition, which teaches you the basics about the setting, who the characters are, and how they fit together, relationship-wise. The rising action builds up to the climax, with minor conflicts and foreshadowing. The climax is where the Big Thing happens. Falling action brings us back down, usually with steps toward fixing the problem that arose during the climax, and the resolution is where everything goes back to normal, or the problem is solved, or some less happy ending is brought about.

I feel odd making this critique, because I have the same exact problem in my writing, but there is way too much rising action, and the climax, falling action, and resolution are crammed into the space of about two dozen pages (out of 134). I feel like I'm more aware of this problem when reading an e-book (like I was with this  book) because I have the page counter right next to the "next page" button, but it's still a problem.

I like that our characters are fairly normal people, without being typical-normal. Marti's schedule is weird because she's a bartender. She's the main breadwinner while her husband works on starting his career. These are normal things in today's life, but based on a lot of "modern" fiction out there, you would think it's still as unheard of as applying it to the Cleavers. So I applaud that.

This novel was written for NaNoWriMo, which - as we all know - means it was written hastily. In the afterword, Gier mentions that it's not a perfect final product, but it is better than the pre-edited version. I agree with Cassy that it needs another solid editing (there are some spelling, punctuation, and half-of-a-sentence-being-repeated mistakes) but it is fairly put-together.

And once more, I repeat: I don't like chick lit. It feels like a friend - who wouldn't really be my friend - telling me all about her woes regarding lovers and hormones and girly stuff, which I would quickly tire of, and start yawning and trying to point out how early I have to get to work the next morning. It's not a topic that grips me in the least. I do know some people who would like this type of story, and I think they would probably enjoy this one.

A Romantic History

This week, we're reading Stuck in Estrogen's Funhouse by Shayna Gier.  It falls firmly into the Chick Lit/romance novel category, so today, I'm giving you a little history on the Romance Novel.  By definition, a romance novel is a book where the main plot must revolve around two people as they develop romantic love for each other and work to build a relationship together.

Samual Richardson's novel Pamela, is usually considered the first romance novel.  Written in 1740, it was the first book that was focused on the romantic relationship between the two main characters.  It was also from the female perspective, which was largely unheard of at the time.

Though Richardson may have created romance, Jane Austen perfected it (really, are we surprised?)  While Pride & Prejudice is considered the best of the romance genre, all of her books focused on the courtship of a specific man and woman, told from the woman's perspective.  Austen's main reason for this was that she didn't KNOW what men did when they weren't around women, so she never wrote about them.  You notice in her books that she never writes about men without the presence of a woman.

The Bronte sisters compounded on her success, putting out Jane Eyre, a wildly popular novel that combines romance with the Gothic novel.

The modern version of the Romance novel didn't appear until the 1970s, though they really took off in the 1980s.  Avon published a romance novel by Kathleen Woodiwiss in 1972, called The Flame and the Flower.  It was the first book to be a single-title paperback.

Romance novels are hugely popular these days, sales comprising more than half of the paperback market.  There are hugely recognizable names, such as Danielle Steele.  She made her entire career on romance novels.

Harlequin Romance novels are probably the most recognized brand of romance novels.  Richard Bonneycastle bought Mills & Boon, a romance novel publishing company.  Bonneycastle realized that explicit romance novels sold better than the tamer once, thus giving birth to the bodice rippers that Harlequin Romance still puts out to this day (and reaffirming the fact that sex sells, even in 1970.)

By Its Cover: Pride & Prejudice

This is the cover of the version of Pride and Prejudice that I read. It pretty much sums up the book, as far as I'm concerned. There's a lady, presented as she would have been in the early 1800s, probably meant to be Elizabeth. Ta-da! That's the story.

Okay, maybe not. But if you try to include any more of the story on the cover, you're going to run out of room. Sure, Mr. Darcy is arguably the next-most-important character and you could put him on the cover with her (as the films seem to do) but that gives away important details (that everyone knows anyway because this is a classic).

There isn't intrigue or anything to pique one's interest on this cover... But there doesn't have to be. This is England's favorite book; it doesn't need any help being sold.

 

I agree with Alex.  My cover wan't much different (it had a BUNCH of early 1800s ladies sitting on a couch), but my cover was the anthology, so it makes sense that there's more than one girl; there's more than one book in my book.

 

If you put too many people on the Pride & Prejudice covers, you will give away a lot and, let's be honest, everyone pretty much knows what happens.  The book is 200 years old.  We don't need to be enticed by the cover because, chances are, we're not picking this book up because the cover looked interesting. 

ReviewMeTwice- Pride & Prejudice by Jane Austen

This week, we read Pride and Prejudice, in honor of Valentine's day (I know; you're just so shocked.  It was such a surprise.)

This book... I have read this book more times than I could possibly count.  Probably about once a year: I hear the name mentioned, and I remember how much I love it, and so I make a concerted effort to pick it up and read it, despite its length.

The thing I probably love most about this book is the language.  Austen just writes... well, absolutely beautifully.  Lizzy, especially, has some quotes that just blow you out of the water.

*****The following passage may contain some spoilers.  And I have just recently found out, that there are still people out there who don't know what happens.*****

“From the very beginning— from the first moment, I may almost say— of my acquaintance with you, your manners, impressing me with the fullest belief of your arrogance, your conceit, and your selfish disdain of the feelings of others, were such as to form the groundwork of disapprobation on which succeeding events have built so immovable a dislike; and I had not known you a month before I felt that you were the last man in the world whom I could ever be prevailed on to marry.” 

There is also a part of the book where Darcy's Aunt, Catherine De Bourgh, comes to essentially bully Elizabeth into not marrying her nephew.  She demands to know if Elizabeth is planning to marry Darcy and tells her to never do so.  Elizabeth, because she's awesome, answers with, "You can now have nothing farther to say [...] You have insulted me, in every possible method.  I must beg return to the house."

****Ok, Spoilers Over.*****

I love the characters; everyone is so fleshed out and I can see them clearly in my mind.  Collins, who is annoying and beady.  Charlotte who, while unattractive, is caring and loving and Lizzie adores her.  Lizzie and Jane's sisters, who are annoying and insipid.  Or worse, feel the need to show everyone that there's a lesson in everything.

I love that after all these years, the story is still around.  I mean, it's hopelessly romantic and entirely unrealistic, but it gives you hope and makes your heart warm.  I know how many flaws there are (for instance, Lizzie doesn't begin to love Darcy until she sees his big house.  It gives off the message that you can change a man.) but at the end of the day, I just don't really care.  I love that Lizzie and Darcy can't stand each other at first.  I love that they're so rude to each other.  I love that no one is really as they seem, except maybe Jane, because she really is that sweet.

I feel like I can't even properly review this book because the writing makes me fall in love with the book all over again, every time that I read it.  I will admit that you have to ENJOY this kind of period writing.  Her writing is flowery and heavy if you're not used to it.  And it is, for all intents and purposes, chick lit.  Wonderfully written and amazingly inspired, but chick lit at the end of the day.

Hopefully, Alex will give you a little less biased review, but mine will contain nothing but love.

My Bottom Line: 5 out of 5

I know Cassy super-loves this book, but I just... don't. (Which is sort of the point of the blog... sometimes this happens.) It took me forever to get through the book, not because the language is difficult or the writing is bad, but it just isn't my sort of story, so I didn't really care what happened next.

That said, it is enjoyable. I really like Elizabeth (because she often seems to be the only one with any sense). I like that she falls for a guy she originally detests (although, knowing the whole time that they'll wind up together because it's as common knowledge as Romeo and Juliet made it too... inevitable).

I love the writing. The wit in every line from certain characters is just fantastic. I can see why this is England's favorite book.

So, long story short, it isn't my cup of tea, but I don't like tea to begin with... so it's probably very good tea, but since I'm not a tea-drinker... well, you get it.

Favorite Literary Couple

To celebrate one of the most beloved romance stories ever written (and England's favorite book of all time), Pride & Prejudice, (and a little holiday coming up on Thursday), we want to tell you about our favorite literary couples.



Mine is Ron and Hermione from the Harry Potter series. And I'm the first to admit that I probably would not squee over them half as much if they hadn't been translated into film. Actually seeing them made them that much more lovable.

I think what makes me love them so much is the build-up. For years we wondered. We get to see their relationship develop, from awkwardly competitive (Hermione's talents lie in academic pursuits, whereas Ron's are more rooted in abstract concepts like courage and loyalty) to witty banter to finally admitting that yes, they really are meant to be together.

Some people thought Hermione would wind up with Harry, which I thought was preposterous. I appreciated the scene where Hermione and Harry dance in the tent in the last film so much because they are just perfect friends.

And of course, who didn't cheer when they saw Ron and Hermione kiss, finally? Well, I did. And most of the people in the theater with me did. And I still do, but more quietly.

One of my favorite things about them, though, is the fact that their Patronuses match. Hermione's Patronus is an otter, which belongs to the same family as weasels (like Weasley). Too much of a stretch? Ron's is a Jack Russell terrier, a breed of dog known for chasing otters. We learn about their Patronuses during the DADA lessons Harry teaches to Dumbledore's Army in Order of the Phoenix, long before we get stronger hints to their relationship.

So, usually I would pick Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth Bennett as my favorite couple.  But since we're hearing about them in HOARDS this week, I'll refrain.  And there is a sadistic part of me that wants to say, "OMG!  Edward and Bella, of course!", but I won't do that either.  Mainly because we know it isn't true.

Will and Lyra, from Pullman's His Dark Materials series, are just about the cutest couple in the history of mankind.  And the best part?  It's not the romance that I inevitably love about them: it's their adventures and their friendship and watching them both grow. 

Will doesn't actually show up until The Subtle Knife.  That's when he passes from his world into an intermediary world, where he meets Lyra.  They save people and explore this strange world and figure out so much about each other.  They meet all sorts of people along the way and, inevitably, fight to save every world.

While they do link up romantically in the final book (which, there is a lot of controversy surrounding it), it's what happens at the end of The Amber Spyglass that tugs at your heart the most.  I won't tell you what happens, because that would just spoil everything, but it's tragic and heartwarming and moving and basically embodies their entire friendship.

It's Comfortable

Everyone has that book that they read over and over and over again.  It's your comfort book; the book you go to because it's an old friend and sometimes, you just need something familiar.  Today, Alex and I are going to tell you about our favorites.  Our favorite book that makes us feel warm and fuzzy.  I won't go so far as to say it's our favorite book (because, I don't know about Alex, but I have a hard time picking just one) but it's a book that we come back to often.  

While Peeps is a book I do continually revisit, I figure I probably shouldn't pick that one since we're reviewing it this week.  Instead, I'm going to throwback to a classic: Pride & Prejudice.

It's interesting, because the first time I read this, I actually wasn't a big fan.  I was in high school, when you're forced to read a lot of things that you're probably not really ready to read.  I got lost in the language and it was just a little rough.  However, I took another shot at it in college, in between my senior year.

Really, Austen knows how to weave a love story.  It's exciting and romantic and the language is poetry and I love nothing more than curling up under a blanket and reading about Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy.

If you ever get the chance, I really recommend picking this up.  It's a wonderful read.

There is one book I used to tell people I read at least once a year. Now, it's more like I read parts of it all throughout the year. It's called The Martian Chronicles and it's by Ray Bradbury.

It's a collection of short stories, in chronological order, about man and Mars. The stories are beautiful and amazing and creative, some sad, some happy.

The reason I got this book in the first place is the penultimate* story in the book. It's called "There Will Come Soft Rains" and it has been republished in high school English textbooks for ages, because it is packed with fantastic examples of imagery. It's a story-slash-description of a high-tech house that has outlasted mankind, and continues to do its prescribed jobs without anyone to do them for. I loved the story when I read it in school, and I unfortunately didn't think about tracking down its original source until after the school year when I read it. It took a while, but I finally found it somehow, and I was completely taken with the entire book.

That's probably the story I re-read the most often (to the point that I have large sections of it memorized word-for-word) but I also really love one that I believe is called "Earth Men." It's about the third expedition of Earthlings to come to Mars (the first two having met mysterious demises, as far as these men know) and they are met with something less than enthusiasm from the native Martians. I can't possibly give away the big twist, but it's amazing and you should read it.

My copy is nearly ten years old, and it's holding up pretty well for a well-loved paperback. It's in my car, so that whenever I want to read a story or just kill a few minutes, I can pick it up and start from anywhere. Despite the depressing nature of most of the stories, this is my warm-and-fuzzy book, and I love it.